Friday 25 September 2009

Old people is da shizzle

If I ever have kids, one thing I am never ever ever going to say to them as they're going through their teenage years is "be happy for as long as it lasts, cause it'll be the best years of your life".

Uh.
Come again?

I don't know what kind of messed up reversed psychology this is supposed to be, but looking back knowing that this was the wisdom passed on to me by various adults, I am surprised that I didn't just drink a jug full of cyanaid kool aid right then and there.
I mean, seriously.

Maybe the people telling me this were captains of the cheer squad, sporting perfect complexions and suspiciously well balanced hormone levels, or maybe the years following high school, regardless of how traumatizing that experience might have been, were just even more disappointing and for some reason did not include you scoring a great job or you magically transform from nottie to hottie, but a rather badly timed pregnancy by some guy named Jonno who's mullet you vaguely remember brushing against your face during your Scorpions soundtracked one night stand and a dead end job that steadily eats away at your dreams and ambitions.

I don't know.

I just know that my teenage years were the most awkward, horrible and angst filled years of my life and I would never in a million years go back. Ever.
And come back in twenty five years and maybe I've changed or repressed enough facts to have changed my mind, but I truly enjoy ageing. I love getting older, getting better.

Young people can suck it.

Just kidding.

7 comments:

Extranjera said...

Totally agree.
I think it's an evil cycle: because you were lied to and kept thinking for years that life'll only get worse from here (really? worse? Meaning I'll grow into a giant wart or what?) you want to pass it on to the new generation. But only because you're really hurting inside.

Not cos your evil.

No way.

(P.S. I love it how all of the VWs on your blog are totally semi-filthy. Is it a feature?)

Anonymous said...

Just found your blog and love it!

'Young people can suck it'-- As someone who will be turning 30 in two short weeks, my sentiments exactly. My teenage years were nothing to brag about either. I actually can't wait to be an old lady--I'll no longer need an excuse for being crabby.

Chris Gooch said...

I agree. The best years of your life are as a baby - you get waited on hand and foot and there is still magic in the world. It's all downhill from there.

Polly said...

oh I'm so glad it's not just me!

my life has started when I hit thirty. which means I'm four years old, but it's been the best four years in my life

Chamois said...

I agree - though most of my teen years weren't half bad, they were definitely nothing exciting or noteworthy...o except for that marriage thing at 18, I guess that was kind of a big deal...but yeah, life's only gotten better since then, and I expect this trend to continue at least until I have kids of my own...

Then I will just tell them "enjoy not having kids of your own while it lasts (i.e.: don't DO it until you move out of my house!) because you little b****es are so totally harshin' my vibes."

I should write a parenting book; I think I'll call it "Apprehending".

Meg said...

So true. I always wish I could go back and try them again, knowing what I know now. And what's that, you ask? That guys want to screw just about everyone, so there's no point in being nervous talking to them.

julochka said...

i love this. i would seriously only wanna go back if i could know what i know now...and i would actually appreciate my skinny self from back them a bit more...